Literary Renegade Gifts

"We have nothing to lose but the chains!"

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

'I guess every team needs a creative renegade.'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

'Rehab centre' "I'm addicted to Irvine Welsh"

'You're developing a reputation as something of a cowboy, Henderson.'

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

'To you it's wine, to me, it's my writer's block vaccine.'

'More hair than brains.'

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

"Could you speak a little louder? I'm recording this."

Daisy Diaper Service

"Without mentioning any names, certain questionable liberties have been taken with our dress code."

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

If You Can't Beat Them

Philosophers On Strike

"Hmmm... there's something not right here..."

"Since he retired, he hasn't quite figured out what to do with himself!"

Female Dominance.

'She kept pinching the Vicar's bum!'

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

"Instead of taking notes, can I just purchase a transcript of today's lesson?"

Problem solving centre.

Reading

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

'I think it's fair to say we're opposed to tame sex marriage.'

Hot pink (and purple) monkey love!

"Why always a book report? Why not ever a TV show report?"

"Where do you keep the non-educational stuff?"

"They do require a jacket and tie but they're not real dogmatic about it."

Leonardo Meets the I.R.S.

"And after I'm through with this, I'll show you the exciting array of other body-piercing services we're now offering!"

"You know how to whistle, don't you? Just pick up the phone and call the S.E.C."