Literary Learner Pillows

"Constructive criticism? It says I can't write my way out of a paper bag, and you call it constructive criticism."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

"Meet The Author"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

First Novels.

The DaVinci Code

Thomas Mann.

The Dorrie Decimal System

Blue Stockings

Jean-Paul Sartre

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Voltaire

"Now I really hate poetry."

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

Television Readers.

'He likes to power nap.'

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket