Literary Investor Pillows

"So you're a poet? I don't get exposed to much poetry these days, unless you talk about the poetry of price-to-earnings ratios."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Profit

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

Or as I prefer to call it, the 'feel-good' factor.

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

"Meet The Author"

"I keep feeling we should float the company"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

First Novels.

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

The Dorrie Decimal System

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

Voltaire

Blue Stockings

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

'He likes to power nap.'

"Now I really hate poetry."