Literary Humor Fan Pillows

'Wait a minute... What the heck is frankincense?'

"Let's hear another suggestion besides 'Moby Dick.'"

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

After years of chasing and fighting they discovered it was all just a misunderstanding.

'Go girl!'

'...we're waiting for Mr. Hyde's character witness, Dr. Jekyll, to appear.'

'Dr. Jekyll, how well do you know this Mr. Hyde who prepared your taxes?'

Devil Reading The Da Vinci Code.

"Her motto is 'If I prick you, do you not bleed?'"

CSI Nursery

Introspection: "To woof or not to woof..."

Meat the Author.

"Beyond the fine starting salary, the job of a poet laureate at this corporation also carries with it an excellent medical and dental plan."

"Thank goodness, it was only 'light' reading..."

"More please."

"Sorry, you're out. This is a period piece."

Self-Improvement/Self-Involvement

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

"Well, we needed the rain."

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

Multi-Generational Books

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

Trump Poutine

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

Jack London

'Tarzan interviewing for a position as a corporate lawyer.' An interviewer asks, 'When we go against the gorillas, how can we be sure that you won't forget which side you're representing?'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

US Credit: 'I'm down grading your credit rating...'

Winter Weather.