Literary Enthusiasts Gifts

Tarzan & Jane Take Up Square Dancing

'These upcoming negotiations are going to be rough Jekyll, son you better send Hyde.'

'He was a great writer'

'I realize that you're upset that Oprah hasn't reviewed your new book on her show. But you are on MY show, so why don't you tell us what inspired you to write 'Overcoming Disappointment and Resentment.''

"I don't think you can accuse another author of plaguerising you for using the same words when they were in a different order."

'Look mum and dad! They let me keep my appendix!' - A young book excitedly showing off his appendix to his arriving parents.

Don Quixote in the Hamptons

Doctor Teflon & Mister Velcro

Quasimodo Zit.

Books versus TV.

'Yes sir. That's Dr. Jekyll, table for two.'

"M Bloggs author lived here on Prozac"

'What do you mean 'What would Jane Austen do?''

Author signing: Meet the plagiarist.

The Prisoner of Zenda

'I won't marry you, but I'll be Robinson Crusoe to your Friday!'

C. Day Lewis.

'What a day! I feel like I've been through the ringer.'

"Mike, Mike, Mike! Guess what day it is!!!"

'Baskerville, that's right: The Hound killed by Sherlock Holmes was one of my ancestors...'

"Oh, Arnold Snivington e-mailed his lastest novel"

'I should've stayed the way I was. Now, I have to exercise, watch my cholesterol, and dodge this little pest called Cupid.'

'Wait a sec! 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times' - is this gonna be a long story?'

'Tom Brown's Schooldays.' ('Jeremy Flashman')

Meet the Author - Scrutinize his Tax Returns.

Lewis Carroll and Colleagues

"This is our Head of Transformation and Change, Doctor Jekyll."

"Yo, novella!"

Shark reading 'A Farewell to Arms'

Meet the Author's Advance

"I like walks in the rain, old barns, and Edna St. Vincent Millay. Does that ring any bells?"

"Well, it works for Susan Sontag."

"The face of the pear-shaped man reminded me of the mashed turnips that Aunt Mildred used to serve alongside the Thanksgiving turkey. As he got out of the strawberry-hued car, his immense fists looked like two slabs of slightly gnawed ham. He waddled over

Truman Capote

Setting the Literary World Ablaze