Literalist Lover Gifts

"When I said mi casa es su casa, Diana. I didn't mean it quite so literally."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

The DaVinci Code

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

Thomas Mann.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Victor Hugo

'For those with books, open and follow along. For those with laptops, follow me on Twitter.'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

Television Readers.

Jean-Paul Sartre

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

Distractions Of The Great

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

Shakespeare was bisexual

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

Horti-Culture

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.