Lion Lover Gifts

"It's like a business. Concentrate on the bottom lion."

Sign in Lion Enclosure: 'Please Don't Eat the People.'

"You were hungry? Case dismissed."

'Sorry, I've been head-hunted by another pride.'

"Protection and food used to be enough, but now, they want romance and time for themselves as well... What are we to do?"

"Go ahead if you see something you like, but I'm afraid my fast food days are over."

"You'd better stand back now: This is going to be a mighty roar..."

'Where's all those lions we were told are out here?'

Gay Pride

I am woman, and also lion, hear me roar.

'Hmmm...'

'Look at that plumage. He must be the alpha male.'

"This is the part I hate most - he's got terrible bad breath!"

Watch it.

The young cub naively tries to exert his dominance...claiming the cozy spot normally taken by the leader of the pride.

"Just because they're old and sick doesn't mean it's okay to prey on your grandparents."

"I'm so sorry darling: the shop was out of anti-dandruff shampoo..."

"And there she was, skillfully tearing a carcass apart, covered in blood and guts: It was love at first sight..."

Mon Dieu!

'What? It was the 'LORD of the jungle'? Ooops... I thought he was called 'LUNCH of the jungle...'

"Overweight old white male, safari suit, expensive gun, large entourage: methinks a trophy hunter is coming our way..."

"Man, what I wouldn't do for one of those free-range meals right now."

'He's very sensitive about his bald spot.'

'We've already got chairs, thank you.'

Tour de France champ Gastone Nencini

'I'll bet it's a wig.'

"Don't panic, you're safe: he's my next appointment..."

"You can sleep in the den, but try to keep the roaring down."

Reality Bites

Lion roaring

'Eat more roughage?! Took me 20 minutes to run this one down...ain't that rough enough?'

Zookeeper reading article - 'Wildcat strike firm fails to block pickets' and saying to lion; 'Come of it, you know what wildcat means.'

"I've had a long day, so I don't want anything that will put up much of a struggle."

"The date was a disaster! Turns out he's a real mama's boy: his mum still does his hunting for him..."

Always a popular motive: Hunter and Prey.