Lion Lover Pillows

"It's like a business. Concentrate on the bottom lion."

Sign in Lion Enclosure: 'Please Don't Eat the People.'

"You were hungry? Case dismissed."

'Sorry, I've been head-hunted by another pride.'

"Protection and food used to be enough, but now, they want romance and time for themselves as well... What are we to do?"

"Go ahead if you see something you like, but I'm afraid my fast food days are over."

"You'd better stand back now: This is going to be a mighty roar..."

'Where's all those lions we were told are out here?'

Gay Pride

'Hmmm...'

"This is the part I hate most - he's got terrible bad breath!"

I am woman, and also lion, hear me roar.

Watch it.

'Look at that plumage. He must be the alpha male.'

Always a popular motive: Hunter and Prey.

"The date was a disaster! Turns out he's a real mama's boy: his mum still does his hunting for him..."

"I've had a long day, so I don't want anything that will put up much of a struggle."

Zookeeper reading article - 'Wildcat strike firm fails to block pickets' and saying to lion; 'Come of it, you know what wildcat means.'

'Eat more roughage?! Took me 20 minutes to run this one down...ain't that rough enough?'

Lion roaring

Reality Bites

"You can sleep in the den, but try to keep the roaring down."

"Don't panic, you're safe: he's my next appointment..."

'I'll bet it's a wig.'

'We've already got chairs, thank you.'

'He's very sensitive about his bald spot.'

"Overweight old white male, safari suit, expensive gun, large entourage: methinks a trophy hunter is coming our way..."

'What? It was the 'LORD of the jungle'? Ooops... I thought he was called 'LUNCH of the jungle...'

"Off you go ladies: herd the prey towards here so that I can get on with the kill. I'll have a nap now though..."

'I just washed my mane and I can't do anything with it.'

'He won't say it, but he loved wrestling with you.'

Best anti-theft systems for cars . . . The Club, Front End Damage, 5 speed, and Lion.

"Yes, it was a mighty roar, but don't worry, it's nothing: I've just told Daddy that Grandma is coming to visit today..."

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

"Don't be daft - where am I gonna find a dentist out here?"