Linguistic Rivals Appreciator T-Shirts

"You better get this through your thick shells. WE are the best idiom for insanity!"

'Don't worry. I'm not charging you for the extra lettering.'

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

'Two famous French wines.' 'Red and white.'

"So from the top. If they need urgent help it's form AC/765c, criticl interventions are CV/U657's and..."

Couple kissing by a 'Ped Xing and Oing' sign.

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

"Well, geez, you don't need to bite my hea.."

Witch's spell check.

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

'I don't like this part. 'Please find enclosed the inclusion of my enclosure'.'

"Dog...God. God...dog. Cat...tac."

'I ask you, Larry the Landscaper, did you ever, under any circumstances, promise anyone a rose garden?'

'Her being multi-lingual has it's drawbacks I'm afraid-she nags me in SIX languages!'

Once again, Daisy had won the 'Employee of the Month' award...'

Couple in Grey

"You don't need to sacrifice good grammar in order to talk dirty."

Simultaneous translation.

'My competitor down the street sasses his parents.'

Business Cliches

Back Down

'To be totally honest, our ship of matrimony is taking on water.'

Elderly couple

"Spell "orange." "The fruit or the colour, Miss?"

'I think it's finally accurate to say that literally everyone is misusing the word 'literally'.'

"This won't work, Josh. I'm bottled water. You're tap."

'I'm still beautiful you know . . . you just have to read between the lines.'

'We don't seem to be doing well in the foreign beverage market. However, due to a mistranslation of our slogan we've become the leading international provider of embalming fluid.'

'Mail' and 'Femail' mailbags.

"I'll be glad when this speech balloon strike is over...!"

'Are you choking or are you serious?'