Lingo Lover Pillows

'I could knock off the legal jargon, but then I'd have nothing to say.'

"I'll stop saying 'irregardless' if you'll stop staying 'at this point in time.'"

An avid text messenger, Katie Hunter started using fewer vowels in her everyday speech.

Puzzled sailor consults 'Sea Lingo for Dummies'

"Come on into my office, twitters, and let's get right down to mumbo jumbo"

"I know you're new to the job, Ms. Jones, but the correct term is 'stat'... not 'move your ass'!"

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"Really, I feel fine. I just want to pick up some psycho-babble."

'I know my memos are looking a bit dated. I have to send for an updated version of the educational buzzword generator software.'

"Spinning, reefing, tacking...they sound like a dress making circle."

Sign on desk reads: 'Business spoken here.'

'Yes, Bwana?'

'The magian didn't have to grouch about the mucker's mafficking.'

Shrewsbury - pronunciation

"Captain, we can't communicate with the creature. It seems to only speak in corporate lingo."

Totes sorry. Flight is legit delayed! :-(

A Puppet Named Juan

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

Campaign for Plain English

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Thru versus Through Traffic

I will study my speling words...

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

A Copy Editor and His Dog

Punctuation Police

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'