Line Conqueror Gifts

A giant crowd, both in line for coffee and airport security.

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

Rage.

Second lifeReal life.

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

Test your patience, back in one hour.

"Must get a longer cable."

'Hand over the last one now kid or you're getting my fist for Christmas!'

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

Crop duster wanted.

Twenty years later, Kim turns the tables on her loathsome former English teacher.

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

Female chemotherapy warrior.

'It's about your reports, Mittens. They're incomprehensible -- It's as if you walked across the keyboard, laid down and rolled over it a hundred times, then took a nap on it.'

'I'd like a few words with you Farnsworth. Aren't those my shoes you're wearing?'

A Learning Curve.

"No, Dad. All this belongs to me right now. I acquired it in a hostile takeover."

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

Star Executive

Man in office fencing with pieces of paper flying about

"I came, I saw I takeovered."

"Seven bookings and four sendings off, and that was just in the queue for pies."

What brings you to therapy, Mr. Park? I'm stuck. Dr. Noodle. I'm paralyzed. I'm not making any progress. Honestly, I'm lost in the trees. I've lost sight of my goals. My health units are low. Units? Unseen enemies are everywhere. I can't sleep. I'm not eating. You're not making sense. Who am I kidding? You're right. The truth? Fine, I admit it. I can't get past level 5!!! I don't do video game counseling. If my mom loved me more, I'd be able to find more ammo.

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

Computer Gamers.

"Yes! I defeated the invading forces! I am master and commander... I am a warlord!"

"If there are more than two people in front of you - we will open another superstore."

"We have two offices throughout the world."

'Here's a twist. Before you go on your quest, an insurance salesman tries to sell you life insurance. If you buy a lot you can date prettier girls.'

'I'm not leaving till he leaves.'

The Conquest

'And you honey, how was your day at the PlayStation?'

"Officer, my husband went back there last night to hook up a DVR... and I haven't seen him since!"