Likes Collector Pillows

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

Seagiraffes

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Toadstools

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Piranhaclaus

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Duck Hunt

Raincloud Umbrella

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Early cyborg.

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Best before 65 million BC.

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

Ice shelfie.

Letter Collecting Nerd

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."