Like Collector Pillows

Like me on Facebook?

"Time to prop up my ego. . ."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

Seagiraffes

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Duck Hunt

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Raincloud Umbrella

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Early cyborg.

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

Best before 65 million BC.

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

Ice shelfie.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

Letter Collecting Nerd

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

Inflating Boobs.