Light-hearted Skeptic Gifts

"I wonder if we'll still have to eat kale this summer."

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

Open House of Horrors

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

"Till death us do part? Don't be so bloody morbid!"

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

'We studied the multiplication table in school today -- frankly, I don't believe a word of it.'

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

'We studied the multiplication table in school today -- frankly, I don't believe a word of it.'

'It may look that way... But actually, I'm an atheist

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

"and what are you giving up for lent, Reverend?" "Religion"

'How do we know YOU'RE not bearing false witness?'

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

'Do I ever wonder about a higher power? No, I wonder what's on TV.'

'This one contains the commandments that will make people ENJOY life! Ha ha, just kidding.'

House of Wishful Thinking

Actual Results May Vary

"As far as I can tell, meditation is just worrying minus the content."

'You've convinced me. I'm becoming an atheist.'

'So help me, which god?'

'So it wasn't b*****t after all.'

Rational explanations

"I don't really believe in the tooth fairy anymore, but if it pays, I play!"

'Jesus? Jesus who?'