Light-hearted Dining Gifts

'Do you have any denture friendly sandwiches?'

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

Get crazy once in a while

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

"Fresh pepper?"

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

Ten out of ten for effort...

''Romantic'? No -- but it makes me feel like having a CROISSANT!'

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

'May I recommend a dry white with the seafood dish.'

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

Ketchup Kafe...Where Kondiment is King!

"I'm allergic to penicillin—is there penicillin in the salad?"

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

'Fancy a good time - no strings attached?'

'Thanks for the invite: Don't cook anything fancy, I eat pretty much anything...'

The vegan hunter

"It may not be the lowest cal, but it's low enough cal for me."

"Guac-A-Mole"

"You need a hobby."

"Yes, I'm still working on it."

'What kind of...'

Man eating his meal with his feet.