License Procrastinator Gifts

"I think you better let me drive, I haven't renewed your license yet."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

The Forever Stamp

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Working from home to-do list.

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

"I'm afraid you neglected to submit the proper development permit application."

Al, The Go-From Guy

"My five least favorite words in the world: By End of the Day Friday!"

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

"I hate going into a staff meeting without a clear exit strategy."

Invaders from Planet Manava.

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

The meeting will start a little late, intelligence is lost in the building somewhere.

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

"There must be some way of getting yourself fired."

The Procrastinatorium.

'Sorry I'm late getting home from work. I overslept.'

"Do you mean am I busy busy?"

Rip van Winkle goes back to the office/

"The Procrastination World Championships were only a month away. He never trained so hard."

"The pastor can't be disturbed. He's preparing for Sunday's service."

Holiday Shopping for Guys

Thanks for making the breakfast meeting, Harris.

Bummer Time Streaming