Letter Collectors Gifts

'It's for you -- I think it's a chain letter.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

Letter Collecting Nerd

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

Santa called but you were out!

I wouldn't mind so much, but it's all junk mail.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

Don't tell me fibs! I know ou wrote to the Corinthians, and ya wrote to the Romans, bnot to mention to Galatians, but do you write to your mother?

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"How many letters can you read?"

The Colonel reading Clive's letters to the ladies of the regiment.

The birth of junk mail.

Reading: Phonics. Using phonics, you learn to read by the sounds of letters. Any questions? Yes. Why does "phonics" begin with "p-h" and not with "f"?

"I won the spelling bee because Eddie Scott invented three letters."

Seinfeld: The Early Years.

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

A day at the FULL CIRCLE RANCH

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

"I've been a postie for 20 years. . ."

Writer breaks in new electric typewriter.

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N. The alphabet invention is great. We should copyright it!

I ONIC. F. E. That group will be very different depending upon whether a "C" or "R" joins them in that second spot.

"I wonder what this was for."

'Dang it, nothing but junk mail'

Postman walking away from mailbox after putting mail in. Sounds of it eating can be heard.

Literary rain