Legalese Aficionado Gifts

"Can you have another look at this? There's still a few sentences people might understand..."

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

Mini tennis players playing on table tennis court.

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

Raheem Sterling

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

"This ump is so good he doesn't even blink."

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

Mohamed Salah

Borgias holding a 'come as you wish to go' party

'When I was a kid, we had to do our own instant replays.'

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

'Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?'

Snowman Football Fan.

'Ok - I'm reaching out!'

'He ordered those 'natural male enhancements',and now he watches football all the time!'

Playing football with snowmen in goal.

'We go to Italy in the summer - it's like a home from home for the kids!'

'As avid soccer player, Roy head-bumps his playing partner's ball in for a birdie.'

"What time is it?" "Half past World Cup."

Filling Cabinet - "Why are all the letters different?"

"I cloned myself to take care of my Thanksgiving duties while I watch football in peace."

'How about that? -- Lady Godiva got a bouffant!'

"Whatta you mean 'minor script changes?' It's supposed to be a western."

"You can tatse the slopes, er I mean hops in this."

'That's Thompson. Best goalie we've ever had.'

Carpe diem

Sisyphus

End of the day bargains at the cheese counter.

"It's the racket season again!"