Un Aficionado Gifts

'....and will somebody get this wombat a peacemaker...and some naughty stickers.'

'Ok - I'm reaching out!'

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

You're my Mona Lisa.

Copycats

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

Madonna of the Pukes.

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Paul Klee

"Portrait of a Lady"

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Cariactures

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

(Camel paintings)

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

German Expressionist Breakfast

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

Distractions Of The Great

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"Mr. Right!"

"An unfortunate museum gift shop." "Banksy activity set." "Jackson Pollock coloring book." "MC Escher building blocks." "Claes Oldenburg miniatures." "Marceau Marceau CDs." "Seurat's connect-the-dots aaAAAAA."

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

Horti-Culture

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'