Legal Eagles On Skates Gifts

Attorneys on ice.

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

"Stop billing your daughter for reading her bedtime stories!!"

"We don’t understand this game. Every time we touch the metal part, he tells us to lawyer up."

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, despite how bad it's going to screw you?"

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

Dance of the sugar plum tax attorneys.

PARALEGAL, 'Hi -- I'm a paracriminal.'

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

'If you can't afford a media adviser the court will appoint you one.'

"Again? I read you your Miranda rights last night."

Paralegal eagle.

I am billing, therefore I am.

Judge to attorneys in courtroom wearing boxing gloves: 'Looks like you're both ready for your opening arguments, gentlemen?'

'Can Bradley come out and litigate?'

"Everybody out of the water! Lawyer!"

"He's doing it again, your honor!"

'...youngsters need to be shown how the law REALLY works if they want a career in it!'

"Guilty of a sense of humor in a tight-ass world."

"These days, everyone is lawyering up."

'Talk to my lawyer.'

Judge getting hair done.

Abortion Debates in the US

Willson, Carswell & Griggs - The Balanchine Version

Stenographer wants 15 minutes of court repeated

'Don't worry, I haven't sued any patients. I got the J.D. as a deterrent to lawsuits!'

Dog defendant and cat jury - The Rigged Jury

'Your Honor, permission to abandon the strict, upstanding, fiduciary responsibilities of my profession for a chance at fleeting personal, carnal gratification?'

'If you dislike the term divorce that much, then just think of it as downsizing the time you spend together.'

Play It Safe

'Sir, this chicken is improperly dressed!'

'Before you attack, may I ask you to ensure that my twelve defenceless, soon to be starving kids, get my will?'