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Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here (If you have already abandoned all hope please disregard this notice.)

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"I hate it when we fight."

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

"Dave, quick word about religious symbols in the workplace..."

"Wow, what a DILF."

Sorry

'What do we do about this online order for 6,000 rounds of ammo, an assault rifle, an automatic handgun and a shotgun?'

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

What really became of the boy named Sue.

"Elective surgery? But I'm not even registered to vote!"

'Well, for the sake of argument, just pretend you've done something wicked.'

"I wouldn't want to be in your shoes."

'It's a whole new twist - a straight-laced detective who does everything by the book.'

"I'm so old I can't remember who's the smart one and who's the pretty one."

"I'm afraid it's a bad case of libel!"

'Drop it! Drop the Lawsuit!'

'I'm sorry, but the only person Mr. McCoy is looking to hire right now is a good criminal defense lawyer. But I'll be happy to pass you resume on to him.'

So...who is your provider ?

"Clark...is there something you'd like to tell me?"

'He doesn't get the jokes - he just laughs at the F-words.'

"It killed on social media yet you say it's horrible?" "Lousy is lousy."

CartoonStock Upload"You are an all-round good guy!"

Scuba Skater

"What I believe is that it was fate that brought me here and that we will be best friends forever!"

"There's a man at the door with a wooden leg."

'Delivery for Muhammad.'

"Last night I ended a long term relationship."

'I'm really getting tired of all these Christmas commercials.'

'Mum! Mum! Can my friend Daisy roam the plains with me this afternoon?'

I never understood why they talk about something "going south" as if it is a bad thing.

Here's to absent friends. Those lucky dogs.

"He's my friend. I made him today."

"I heard smart girls like smart guys."

'Of course I forgive you. That's what friends do. How did you know it fell out of my cone?'