Learning Pharmacology Gifts

"People are always whining about food labelling, but there's NOTHING that ANYONE with a reasonable chemistry degree and maybe a PhD in pharmacology wouldn't with a little effort, be able to understand....At least a little."

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

2021

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

vaccine wars.

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

'We look for a new drug, we find a virus - we look for a new virus, we find a drug...'

'Dear Diarrhea, Day 84. Well, I'm constipated again today...'

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

"The bottle says that 'Extreme Hair Growth' is a rare side effect of this medication."

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

'Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine.'

Thank you, Essential Workers

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

I'm taking you off trying to stay young.

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

'In a nutshell, foods are drugged and drugs are eaten like food.'

Fighting the Pandemic

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

Booster shots

"No, I won't write your prescription legibly...you'd just google it and ask a lot of dumb questions."

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

'A problem with the Phase II trials. Everyone - all the people - was given the placebo, and no one got the drug.'

"Unfortunately, there's no cure—there's not even a race for a cure."

The Pill-of-the-Month Club!

'But Timmy, you have to eat your antibiotics, or you'll never become a big and strong bacteria.'

'Hmphh. Happy as clams, indeed. They're just all on Prozac.'

'We're all out of flu vaccine - how about something for anxiety...?'

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

When bacteria trash talk to antibodies. Oh yeah?! You and what course of antibiotics?!