Lazy Jogger Gifts

Walking the dog.

"Back from your jog already? I thought you were going to go for the burn."

Walking a dog on a treadmill.

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

City Marathon.

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"I run around this high school track every morning."

'Hey, wait for me!'

Robber on treadmill

Running

Poetry in motion - Runners quoting poems as they jog.

"If I adopt you, you're going to have to wake me up and walk me twice a day."

"He is walking from 'Lands end to John'o'Groats', virtually."

"That's how you're getting your steps in, putting your fitness tracker on the dog?"

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

"Running is great. Unless you compare it with not running."

Spinner luggage is fast becoming the city walker's, walking companion of choice. There's no stopping, no mess, nor butt sniffing, with the added bonus that it comes with you when you go on holidays. . ."

Runner's High, Runner's Low

'I need to do more exercising? Are you kidding?! I'm a kind of marathon runner! I run from the bed to the fridge, then to the table, back to the fridge and then to the TV, back again to the fridge and retour to the TV day by day!'

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

"Rum and coke...why, what do you drink on a fun run?"

'It's just a recliner with built-in heart rate monitor. But look at how many big inflatable balls are sold as exercise equipment.'

I think when they talk about 'taking more excercise' they meant more than lifting the remote control.

Cross-Country Sledding

"It's a deal: Two more years, then we let ourselves go."

"I hear Presbyterian is the new Methodist."

'It's so much more enjoyable since we got an electric one.'

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

"Look, Honey! No teeth!"

Studies show an optimistic attitude can add years to your life ? usually at the expense of everyone else around you.

'NEW Down hill exercise bike'

"Next bench is four steps."

I bought a pair of running shoes, and haven't seen them since.

'He stated jogging to work.'

What would it take to get you to start running? Frankly, doctor, it would take someone chasing me.