Lawn Mower Lover Gifts

"Can I help you?"

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

Beginning Yarder.

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

Biker Lawn Mower

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'Don't forget to put gas in the car and the mower.'

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

Beware of the Lawn

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

'Al's Lawn Care Service: There's no crabgrass too crabby for us!'

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

Cow Pilot.

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

"I've found the lawnmower!"

'...so I said to Linda, 'I can't do yard work in the rain!''

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

'You know it's too hot to use the sprinkler when the spray turns to steam.'

"Who's a good boy?!!"

"I can't go on. All the weeding, mowing, digging, pesticides, and gopher holes really hurts you know. It's just not worth it anymore."

God builds the first lawn mower.

Potential Into Kinetic Energy Conversion Method #18