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'Financial planning requires long-term thinking. Especially if you get caught.'

'In future a reg number will suffice, ok.'

Two pigs are booked by a police pig who's pointing at a sign that says, 'No Porking'.

Trial by Media

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

'The highest court in the land.'

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

"We understand you wish to report a crime Madam? I'm Inspector La Garde and this is my able assistant Defective Constable Wallis."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, dummy!'

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

'I bet this is going to be another round of criminal bashing, isn't it?'

"No offence Jon, but..."

"Ignore him - he hates everyone I haul in for questioning."

Arrest of La Tuta

"The robber was about 5' 11"...."

'I think we both know that's a decoy.'

"I take it you want to go for a perp walk."

'Emotional blackmail.'

"I told him he was allowed one phone call. He's making a pledge to Channel 13."

Bobsled Police.

'We struck these tax laws, but they somehow spontaneously regenerated into line 501(c), section 746-e, subsection (3), as described in paragraph (2).'

"It's been in self-drive mode all morning, maybe it's not programmed to recognise stop signs?"

'Why can't I park it here? I'm just getting my moneys worth.'

The Continuing Adventures of Mel Hufnagel, Corporate Head-Hunter...

'Okay, just be patient -- it could be months before they learn to obey all of these.'

'You have the right to remain silent...'

"We're all metric now..."