Laundry Perfectionists Gifts

'For the love of God, does anybody have a stain stick?'

Moses separating his Laundry.

The Missing Sock Returns

"First time pruning?"

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

"Drunk, yet orderly"

"Looks like Harriet mixed her lights and darks again."

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

'Caw blimey!'

"This is your new solar powered dryer?"

"Like you, I was lost...then I found Jesus!"

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

Help! (Woman stuck on washing line).

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

Santa's wash day.

You can tell when the blades get dull on your rotary nose-hair clippers.

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

'Whenever Mat gets a little over-confident, I tell him to try to fold a fitted bed sheet.'

Woman puts a targeting sight on her vacuum cleaner.

'Sorting the laundry is hell.'

"Yes, they come out white than white, but when they went in they were blue."

"And do you, Scott, take Amy, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, through mysterious separations of indefinite duration, as long as you both may live?"

"Why do I always gain socks in the wash?" "In a Parallel Universe"

"Did I hear you use the phrase 'Earn my keep'?"

"I'm making him take a spin class."

"You realize one of us is not coming back."

'I distinctly remember saying 'No Starch'.'

Heavy-duty, super-capacity, two speeds, 10 cycles. All of them vicious.

"We've done it! We've done it! We've discovered a detergent that takes the chore out of washing and makes all other detergents seem old-fashioned by comparison!"