Late-night Tv Enthusiasts Gifts

"It's 4 A.M.—maybe you'd sleep better if you bought some crap!"

"It's now ten o'clock- we have your child."

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

"So—who are you angry at currently?"

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

'Because it was there, Dave, because it was there.'

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

'Madge! Desperate Housewives is on.'

"Grandma's TV is so old it wasn't made in a foreign country."

'You know things are screwed up when people take late-night comedians seriously and politicians as a joke.'

"Yes, Madame, Teletubbies."

"You don't understand, Mom. Our staying in and watching TV is not the same as you and Dad staying home and watching TV in Dayton, Ohio."

'I think someone's asking to go out.'

I don't think we should have linked the remote to the credit card.

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

"I know I say it in every episode, Carson, but the world is changing and we have to change with it."

'Santa has been and he's taken our telly...'

'It creeps me out when he watches the History Channel and takes notes!'

"Why do mothers and fathers only get one day and sharks get a week?"

"Come on, Baldo...get up. It's twenty to eleven."

'Face it, 24 hour grocery stores were made for people like us.'

'Hello, Mum!'

After hours TV.

'Dad was fibbing, Mum... the new TV DOES show stuff beside sport!'

'It's not a punchline to an office joke or TV commercial, Perkins. 'You're Fired' - for real!'

'We need a new TV, Dad — it's stupid watching 'Reading Rainbow' in black and white.'

'The following program may not be suitable for those of you who are sick and tired of politics....'

'Bartender! Will you please explain why my gaze has fallen upon a piece of wall not plastered with a blaring high-def TV???'

'No, I haven't told them the telly's gone yet!'