Late Fee Legend Pillows

'Sure it's an impressive collection. Too bad they're all overdue library books.'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

"I can sleep late, but, as his agent, I still get ten percent of the worm."

My definition of 'quality time?'...charging $500 per hour.

Bed and Lunch: For People Who Like To Sleep In

I was a day late and a dollar short, but it was a personal best!

'We take late returns very seriously at this library Mr Wilson!'

'I hear your fees are very reasonable.'

'Listen, pal, Happy Hour was over ten minutes ago.'

'Sorry I'm late - My alarm must have gone off while I was asleep.'

Your library book is overdue.

"I heard you are charging a monthly fee for using your debit card, and I'm here to complain!"

'Myself, I'm not a morning person, so I'm definitely not interested in one of those up-at-the-crack-of-dawn types, you know what I mean?'

"Sorry I'm late, but I was somewhere else."

"As you know, Ed, my pockets are considerably deeper than yours. Therefore, in addition to my share I'll be needing a percentage of yours."

Conan the Librarian.

"Sorry I'm late, I was asleep when my alarm went off."

Teller - Hand over some money! I need to pay my bank charges.

Lawyer to other: 'If you ask me, whiplash cases are a pain in the neck.'

The clock for people who have no idea when they will be there.

"Well? We're late and all the good trees are taken."

'Deposit $1.00 - This is your final notice before we send it to a collection agency.'

Attorney basic fees.

Some airlines are charging for coffee and water. Brilliant efficiency, but also a threat. To us? We're a caf

"Sorry, babe, runnin' late, start without me."

"Baldo, get up! It's 1 o'clock in the afternoon! And take that auto window tint off your windows!"

"You've got to be kidding. It's freaking noon!!"

Everyone smile and say FEES

"Our high fees are based on a longstanding reputation for charging high fees."

"This charge is for your monthly service fee and this charge is because you didn't have it."

"If Mr. Jackel ever gets here, ask him about this award for always being late at his last job."

Excess Baggage: Kenny beats the airlines' hated add-on fee system... for the moment.

'Grabbit and Squeeze' - 'We Never Lose' - "Perhaps you didn't realise that our mission statement doesn't refer to winning cases"