Late Comer Pillows

'Sorry I'm late, I was caught in a hole in the space time continuum.'

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

"I'm sorry, but you didn't recognize me as the Messiah when I had braces and glasses."

"Sorry I'm late. Traffic was fine. I just don't like any of you and don't want to be here."

After many years of wavering Dennis finally makes the decision to step out of his comfort zone.

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

Niche Extracurriculars

"He's never up before eleven."

"I can sleep late, but, as his agent, I still get ten percent of the worm."

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

"I can't help you, Dear. I'm still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. "

The inventor of the clock realizes his mistake

'Gravity wins - again.'

'Of course you're a failure! Look at you - seventy-two and you've never had a mid-life crisis!'

Bed and Lunch: For People Who Like To Sleep In

'Sorry I'm late, Fred. I forgot to plug in the car.'

"Listen, if this takes much longer I'll be late for work and I'll be a dead man!"

Diet Enforcer

'Maybe I'm not a failure — maybe I'm just a late bloomer!'

'I promised my Dad I'd be home by ten but I didn't say if that was P.M. or A.M..'

The breakfast of teens.

'You're just an old person who hasn't blossomed yet...'

'Murdock oversleeps every day - He's always an accessory AFTER the fact.'

"I should've done this years ago. All the good ones got taken."

"Rex hates getting up in the mornings."

"The trouble with this town is there is no day life."

'Myself, I'm not a morning person, so I'm definitely not interested in one of those up-at-the-crack-of-dawn types, you know what I mean?'

"No woman should have children over 40, that's quite enough for anybody."

"I don't know which is harder-- getting Smythe started in the morning, or his computer."

'C'mon son - shake a leg.'

"Baldo, don't tell me that's what you're having for lunch."

"Baldo, get up! It's 1 o'clock in the afternoon! And take that auto window tint off your windows!"

"Well? We're late and all the good trees are taken."

'Sorry folks you've missed this cartoon.'

"You've got to be kidding. It's freaking noon!!"