Language Adventure Gifts

'Just follow these simple instructions.'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

Campaign for Plain English

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

Why we need poetry. . .

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

"He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites."

Some card-game puns

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

Introducing...Anagraman.

'Whoooa,MAN,check out this STORM! It's PELTING down!'

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

The Family Joules: Part 21

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

Wordplay: In The Bag.

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

'Stick them up...'

"It lost a little something in translation."

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

Henry the amazing talking dog.

"I stand corrected."

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

'This is the fun part...waiting to find out just what we've ordered.

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

'the selling of seashells by the seashore was sluggish.'

'Mom and dad...if someone threw a rock at me, it would really be like killing two birds with one stone.' 'I told you if we had a child, he'd be a wise-quacker.'

Staff Yearbook

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'