Landscaping Gifts

'I'm saving up for a hedge.'

A man imagines he looks like a farmer on a tractor on a ride-on mower and

'I can't cut the grass until I find the lawnmower and I can't find the lawnmower until I cut the grass!'

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

'That's your idea of weed control?'

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

I can never tell the plants from the weeds! Pull them all up and the ones that grow again are the weeds!

'We've had complaints about your sensory garden for the blind.'

'Wait a minute! Aren't you going to use an anesthetic?'

'So, how much to remove this ugly old tree? $1750. It's not THAT ugly.'

'Please tell me you didn't pay for that stuff.'

'Wait, wait, stop!'

Mixed Ability Brown, Landscape Gardener

'Truthfully, I never wanted the world to beat a path to my door.'

Garden Shop: Top Soil. Bottom Soil.

'That plant food really works!'

A Wisconsin Cheesescape

"I'm greener, yes. But am I happier?"

"If you ask me, that one's a better deal. It has more safety features."

'My therapist suggested I redirect my anger into landscaping and gardening!'

'Everything goes with the house exept the lawn. They're taking that with them.'

Good design can make a garden look larger than it really is.

"Well, that's created a little order in a world of chaos."

"Before invasive species, the only things I could grow were weeds and mildew."

Fences Make Good Neighbors.

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

'You were right - it's shallow rooting but spreading'

Tree to man carrying it, 'plant me there!'

Zenboni

Sheds

Greener grass.

'Where am I going to bury my bone now that they put paving stones in?'

'My answering service tells me you called about a job back in July.'

'Gee, Dad... I wish we could afford to send our grass like that to get it cut!'