Lacrosse Dreamer Gifts

Teddy Tree is trying out for lacrosse. LOL! No way! That spazoid nerd? Hey! No one disses my little brother! Ok. Ok! Sorry! That's my job.

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Football Fans

'Desert island cartoons - and you?'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

Runt! You'll never make the team. We'll see! You can't even tie your shoelace! Great technique!

Midnight Basketball

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

Baseball Dreams

"I'm running away to join the W.N.B.A."

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

I'm filling out my myface.com and I have a question. Rudy Park, tech genius, at your service. Should I pretend to be 10,12 or 26 years old? 32? I configure browsers, not fake personas! I think I'll play for the Broncos.

Not The Real Me

Kurt's good. Look at his family. His dad and mom really know how the game is played! They're his personal coach and videographer. As I said

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

'He's soccer mad! Ever since he did his first sums he's wanted to be a players' agent.'

"Behind the back, between the legs, around my disappointed parents, nothing but net."

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

Your counselor wants you to concentrate on one sport. Ok. Sports Camp. Which do you like best? Maybe baseball. Great. Or soccer or lacrosse. I'm proud of you, Teddy! You don't care about being the cool sports star! Ok. Then soccer.

Your mother and I don't think the weekend lacrosse league is a good idea, Teddy. Why not? Too much driving. But I ride the school bus home from practice all week! Exactly! Our favorite mass transit vehicle! I can't wait to get my license!

Penalty

"You want England to win what!? Put me back in the lamp!"

Footballer Dreaming of the Football as Sack of Money

What's this for? Screwing up my Lacrosse career. Slam! Are you ok, honey? Tough tryout. I thought they had already chosen the team. They have. Now they're determining the pecking order. Is Teddy's health care paid up?

Yale shadow

Athletic Darwinism.

'Boy, I love pretending to be Jens Lehmann...Now I can go home to watch football on TV!'

"Why, it's Daphne—home from Foxcroft."

"Why are you studying? Go outside and practice shooting three pointers, so you can ear big bucks like Steph Curry."