Labor Law Aficionado Gifts

"Watch out for Donlan. He came back from Tokyo with a black belt in collective bargaining."

"There's a $1M bonus in it for you, if you can rid us of the $2 an hour penalty rate."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

'As a CEO, I stand up for our rights. You've got the right to work 17 hours a day and if you don't do it, I've got the right to fire you.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

Violent Crime Statistics

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

Lady Justice.

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

'Where's the fun in being an employer if you can't spontaneously sack someone anymore.'

'It's a suitability test I give all flexible working requests.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

Labor Day '19

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

From Hunter-Gatherer to Influencer: The Evolution of the Dignity of Labor

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

"The law is an ass...employment law, however, is an asset."

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

Baby's first words.

"To be honest, I'm not sure if you marking your territory is legally binding in a boundary claim dispute."

'Your honour, we find the defendent 'politically incorrect'.'

Two lawyers in a royal court

'I take it you're looking to some extra hours!'

'How can the employees accuse me of running a sweatshop? Don't I let them go home after midnight?'

'Tell the truth: does this affidavit make me look fat?'