Lab Whisperer Gifts

Tough germ.

Bitchbark Canoe

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Police Feline Unit

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

Licensed Therapist

"No no, I said sit!!"

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

"They think we're their best friend. Just play along with it."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Barks in code.

"It get it – you're hungry."

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

'Bert's dog training.'

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

Canine Companion

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."