Lab Enthusiast Gifts

If you can't say anything peer reviewed about your work, don't say anything at all.'

'I'm growing mini human brains from stem cells.'

'We need an Exit strategy.'

'We ran a full DNA test, STR and Mitochondrial analysis... and Bob here 'Googled' it just to make sure.'

Testing the 'All we can do is sit and wait' theory.

'I don't know how they dispose of our toxic wastes and I don't want to know.'

"The resolution is superb, but I can't stand having to wait through all the ads first."

'I don't know how they dispose of our toxic wastes and I don't want to know.'

'At last - the new flu vaccine.' 'Hold everything. We've just discovered a newer flu virus.'

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'

'I know I've been hard on you at times, pushed you when you were tired, studied you, probed you, but it was all in the interest of science.'

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

'I didn't exactly write the article, but...well, I didn't exactly do the research either.'

"I can't go out with you again. There just isn't any chemistry between us."

I can't believe it's not food!

'Look at this! These little critters are not asexual after all.'

'Reallly Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!'

"I think it's my turn to light the Bunsen-burner."

"I feel so seen right now."

Leprosy Research

"But you must continue as a lab rat! Can't you see we have three mouths to feed?"

'...then add some of the yellow powder to those blue crystals, heat it for a while, and see how you like it.'

'You can't call it a miracle drug just because you added miracle whip!'

"You make monopropylenes, we make monopropylenes, we merge, and voila! Polypropylenes."

"Well, still no vaccine, but we're pretty close to yet another cure for erectile dysfunction."

"Yes, they're celebrating! I've heard it was a substantial grant, so hopefully the quality of the food in the mazes will improve..."

"It's ten o'clock. Do you know where you research is headed?"

Life in the lab - 'Come on, you can't fool me...I know you've been seeing another test tube!'

'We realized he's a lot more valuable to us this way.'

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

'You'll have to take over Weinbart's entropy experiment -- he died.'

'Neat! Which ones are the bad guys?'

'Professor Dinsmore talked about a major breakthrough in his cloning experiments!'

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

"The search for a new painkiller has been a real headache."