Kitchenware Specialist Pillows

"Good afternoon..."

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

"You're the lid to my pot."

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

GMOs: The Next Generation

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

Salt and Pepper

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

"Wow! The big guy! And what kind of B.T.U.s am I looking at here?"

"Doctor. I am speechless"

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

"Are you as excited as I am?"

"The blender just texted—we forgot to turn off the stove."

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

'It's hard to slice a potato once you've looked it in the eye.'

Mankind's earliest ancestor emerges from the primordial ooze, closely followed by a prehistoric species of re-sealable plastic containers.

Why Running Away Together Is Not a Very Good Idea...

"First thing when you get home tonight help me with the refrigerator."

'Ahh, but it's a Dyson saltshaker.'

Pocket Knife Food Processor

The History of Anti-stick

"Here's our everything's included meal kit. How do they stuff a cook and dishwasher in there?"

Jim's Smart Kettle

"I swear- the next one of you that beeps at me is gonna be sorry."

Flatware Follies.

'I don't know if artificial intelligence in a toaster is a good thing. It just seems to make toast whenever it feels like it.'

'I'll swap you my Wimbledon freebies for your Anodised pan set!'

'Hot indeed.'

A spoon you can run away with, but a spork is the kind of practical utensil you marry.

"So much to do... so little time."

Yard Sale: Like-New Kitchen Gadgets