Kitchen Supplier Gifts

'I feel it only fair to warn you that the job does come with some strain attached.'

Come dine with me!

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

"That's it. We’re toast."

"You're the lid to my pot."

Soup of the month.

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

Too much cilantro

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

"Incredible! Once again, you've made the perfect piece of toast."

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

Salt and Pepper

The Perfect Foil

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

"Do you know I fought an hour with that salmon you're eating."

There! I've made my year's supply of zucchini bread! That's kind of a lot. How can you store them all? It's no problem. I just throw out last year's supply.

"Oh no I left my bagpipes in the oven."

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

Well, what did you expect on the mother ship?

"You know, statistically speaking, at least one of these gingerbread men is gay."

Entertainment systems

'Well, ex-CU-U-Use ME!'