Kitchen Narrative Artist T-Shirts

Chef makes a cook book.

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

Wok. Don't Wok.

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Emotion of Mr. Kenwigs on hearing the family news from Nicholas

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

'I was in the catering corps.'

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

You're the icing on my cupcake!

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

"It's a recipe called no-cook fish chowder."

'Mary had a little lamb - with mint jelly.'

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

"When I was young, we personally prepared all the food for each and every meal!"

'Will I have to be a mum when I grow up?'

'Do you call this spaghetti'

'Okay, kids...time for your bath.'

Amy Sedaris

'How do you stop a fish from smelling?'

"Save yourself — it’s a casserole!"

When Tia Carmen says... "It's time to eat healthy!" it means... "I'm only using one stick of butter instead of three."

Avocado Timeline

The secret lives of household things.

'He's all eyes!'

Decaying corpse

"I couldn't have made my family recipe raisin date nut cake with it's secret ingredient without Jimmy's help."

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

"The holiday roast has yams, petters, carrots, pumpkin, parsnips, and tomato. What shall we call it?"

'Flipping pancakes.' 'Waiting with a net.'

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

'Mom! Instant oatmeal is NOT fast food!'

'Well, ex-CU-U-Use ME!'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."