Kitchen Chaos Wrangler Gifts

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Cookbooks

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

Man's cooking explodes.

How to correctly estimate cooking time

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Ten out of ten for effort...

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

Anti-inflammation recipes

"Bogeyman under your bed? Oh, no, sweetie, there's no room under there… unlike your closet."

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

Chef De Party.

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Disaster in the kitchen.

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'Do you want toast with that?'

Cooking

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

Woman in need of an extractor fan.

Chef: 'Howz that Octopus coming along Jeff?'

"Today is the day I start the new me!"

Parental Training Course

One reason secret family recipes are usually best kept secret.

Chef looking up confused, Waiter behind him with pancake on his head.