Kiss Collector Pillows

"So you kiss me and I turn into a prince? No thanks, sweetie, I'm gay. I'm already a queen."

'Of coure you're the only girl I've ever kissed,on a desert island,that is.'

"I dreamt I was on a desert island with seven starving women."

I only have eyes for you

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

'I met my wife in unfortunate circumstances. I was single.'

The most fabulous Gran in the world.

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

'Luckily, it doesn't look too serious.'

Unsmiley face at the psychiatrist...

"I'll give you a big wet kiss.. "

"Too much club."

Baby face

Michael Jackson: The thriller of entertainment.

'I don't know about this new computer inventory system. It just ordered a thousand left handed four fingered surgical gloves.'

Tree of Love

'I bought one and got one free! Best of all, they're both pregnant.'

"Hmm, well, I wouldn't worry too much. This condition is very common in your profession."

Two minds but with a single thought.

'Special offer today -TWO for one, sir!'

Dancing in Love

"Look, Gwen!...Beak warmers!"

"How many is too many?"

The language of the heart

"Say Cheshire Cheese."

'Take us to your chief emoticon.'

"We met through a contact tracing app."

Valentine's Day

'Please! Take these and let my buddy go!!'

'HEY,no Tongue!'

He's not going to say anything. He just likes to lick his glove.

'Where the hell are my clubs ?'

'Happy hour was over an hour ago. Wipe that stupid grin off your face!'

'There's nothing wrong. My hands are cold and I left my warm gloves in the tractor.'

Missing heart