Kingdom Keepers Gifts

Bob's last days as moat monitor.

'I'm beginning to think that you're WILLFULLY apathetic!'

"Before it's too late, Dad, I want to take the opportunity to say 'I love you.'"

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Michael Jackson

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

"The date protection policy is all about access to information, and we all know information is POWER!"

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

The Goalkeeper

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

"It was a mom-and-pop, but we inherited it."

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

"Your farm's doing well John. What's your secret?"

'The 79 cent fish ate the $2.50 fish - shall I charge him $3.29 for it now?'

Cat plays a golf shot from a litter box.

"Someday, son, all this will be yours. It'll be under water, but still ..."

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

"The militant hard-liners are making demands, the fanatical zealots are issuing threats, and the moderate centrists are offering suggestions."

Vodka

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

Woman welcomes back her cat but not its new kittens.

Goal

Scot country dancing,

Title page from 'The Scouring of the White Horse'.

"I'll let you in on a little secret -- every pill on these shelves is a placebo, and I have no formal training."

"Sorry, Dad."

Librarian.

"Like WikiLeaks has nothing better to do."

She envied her sometimes - all footloose and feline-free.

'What?... You wanted your horse SHOD!?'

'Please Mike! Not in front of the children.'