Kingdom Keepers Gifts

Bob's last days as moat monitor.

'I'm beginning to think that you're WILLFULLY apathetic!'

"Before it's too late, Dad, I want to take the opportunity to say 'I love you.'"

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

"The date protection policy is all about access to information, and we all know information is POWER!"

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

The Goalkeeper

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

"It was a mom-and-pop, but we inherited it."

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

"Your farm's doing well John. What's your secret?"

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

"Someday, son, all this will be yours. It'll be under water, but still ..."

'The 79 cent fish ate the $2.50 fish - shall I charge him $3.29 for it now?'

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

Goal

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

Woman welcomes back her cat but not its new kittens.

Vodka

Title page from 'The Scouring of the White Horse'.

Scot country dancing,

"I'll let you in on a little secret -- every pill on these shelves is a placebo, and I have no formal training."

She envied her sometimes - all footloose and feline-free.

"Like WikiLeaks has nothing better to do."

'What?... You wanted your horse SHOD!?'

Librarian.

"Sorry, Dad."

'You can read, right? -- I want you to check this thing for loopholes.'

I thought we agreed, this birdbath was our little secret!

"A lot of blood, sweat and tears went into making this company what it is today! My father worked hard for what I've got."