Kingdom Contemplator T-Shirts

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

Professional woman in pub

"Shall we put it in play?"

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

'I just can't keep up with the conversations in deep space.'

"I let go of all my earthly attachments, but there's one I can't seem to shake."

'What I especially like about being a philosopher-scientist is that I don't have to get my hands dirty.'

Caterpillar Paranoia

'What? -- I send you all this great sunlight, and you waste it growing PROTOPLASM?'

Is there a reason I'm going into the red? Reason? Am I being penalized? Have I done something wrong? Maybe it's like A Wonderful Life. Your greed is catching up to you. You're experiencing bad karma. So I need to raise my prices?

'Do you realize it takes over 2000 laws to enforce the ten commandments?'

'Since the universe is rapidly expanding, there's a lot more that we have to worry about now.'

Money isn't everything, but then, what is?

Apocalipsis

"If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it — who cares?!"

"Go forth and multiply under the constraint of sustainability within Nature's framework? What the heck is THAT supposed to mean?"

"Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise."

"This human experiment has gone on long enough. Give the hippos control."

'Count yourself lucky - he used to SHOOT the messenger.'

"Kiss me before the biology teacher finds me!"

'They made him take a vow of silence so he'd have to stop complaining about his oath of poverty.'

Today is the first day of the rest of my life, Axel. Is that the good news or the bad news?

'Is $8.5 million really worth all this?'

'How about bearing false witness for you neighbor?'

"Totality was great, but now that it's over I'm like, 'What am I even doing?'"

"Oh, to be a Mayfly."

'Hey, don't look at me -- I was AGAINST free will.'

"As a single diner, you will be seated at an awkward table by the restrooms where your lonely presence won't bother other diners."

'I think I just blew my diet. Do you know what the glycemic index is for a communion host?'

'You realize, it may take us awhile to INTERNALIZE these....'

"Pay no attention. It's his way of telling us he needs a lot of space."

"I wonder if there's life as we know it on other planets."