Kids Crafts Gifts

'Never say 'let's dye a hundred eggs'. You'll be eating your words for weeks.'

"Young Frankenstein"

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

Instructional guide to scribbling

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

The Origami Society...

Face painting by numbers.

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

Little doctor.

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

"It's a mobile."

Circus Act

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

"I can't see a blinkin' thing."

"Do you have any knitting patterns for somebody who can only count to five?"

Building giant sand pies.

'Your report card grades are poor. Maybe you should stop building model airplanes. The glue is getting to you.'

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

Children's Imagination

This year Mike decides to make his own Valentine's cards.

'Harvey does all his own 'get well' cards.'

'It's more festive-looking!'

"Someday we will escape from this prison."

'I had a cough at the time!'

'I preferred his earlier work.'

'God, quick! Give me the gift of the gab.'

The Authentic Christmas.

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

"I think I know where the passion in our marriage has gone."

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

"I can now fetch anything you want - on Etsy."

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.