Keyboard Theologian T-Shirts

"Why do I bother to evangelize online when no one listens?"

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"Do you honestly believe we evolved from a single snow flake?"

The Proust of Twitter

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

"He's very disciplined about his writing, every morning he stares at the keyboard for at least 4 hours before he allows himself a cup of tea!"

A woman playing a keyboard

"The time has come for some tough cost-cutting decisions, and I'm forced to ask myself, do we really need a bass?"

What Does God Know?

Thomas Cranmer

'He's a man of few works. He likes to talk, he just has a limited vocabulary.'

"Keep practicing, and someday you'll be able to play the two songs you remember at houses that also have pianos."

The band.

The Escape Key

'It's not encrypted, Captain. That's just the clerk's usual typing.'

'It's just like New-Time religion, but recognizes sin.'

"God's sent us some chocolates."

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

'Do you ever wonder if we'll evolve into creationists?'

'Well if you don't want the apple, can I tempt you with this?'

"Are you sure you sent out those invitations?"

When The Seven Deadly Sins Come Knocking.

'Well, you heard wrong -- Zen Buddhism doesn't have a Missouri Synod.'

Cyberwarfare

Col Pugno

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comment section just solved the Middle East crisis."

A 60's pop group

"It's called monotheism, but it looks like downsizing to me."

"We pride ourself on diversity."

Heavenly meetings.

'Oh I've seen this before - an encounter with the Goldberg Variations I fear!'

"We never discuss religion."

'I don't think you're trying hard enough to look at things from the sinner's perspective, Reverend.'