Keto Curious Gifts

Sick Of A Low-Carb Diet

"I think she's figured out what W-A-L-K means."

"Where do we put Desserts?"

'Mighty strange weather tonight, followed by downright weird tomorrow....'

'If, as you say, they're so evolved, why do they need to wear clothes to survive?'

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

Today's lesson, the rainforest.

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

"Hair spray"

"Now make sure your heat is high enough to sear your putrid meat quickly."

'Would you like your dividend in pennies, nickels or bitcoin?'

'These bitcoins things are backed by technology and the internet! What could possibly go wrong?'

"I'm never ready for sweater weather."

"For far too long, we've missed out on the opportunity to profit from our videos."

"Yes, the migration flight home is always faster, but it's thanks to the prevailing winds, not just because we're keen to get home..."

"One slice—hold the bread."

"Did no one tell you that at this time of year everybody flies south?"

Zombie Pulse Eating Vegans.

"The Real Reason For Global Warming."

"I miscounted."

Just north of the rainforest: the mostly-sunny-with-a-30%-chance-of-rainforest

What's 'Bitcoin'?

'I'll give you a HUGE bonus in bitcoins if you can explain to me what the hell they are.'

"It just wasn't working out. He's liberal low-carb and I'm strict keto."

"These NFTs I keep hearing about -- I don't know what the hack they are but I want one on my desk by the end of business today! Now movie it, people!!!

Continental drift - an Eskimo in the jungle.

'What exactly is 'Haggis'?'

'It's an antique, but as accurate as any modern forecasts.'

"It's January Dad, where's the snow?"

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

"Don't feel bad. Even I don't understand me."