Kennel Caretaker Gifts

'My husband's just getting some ready to show you.'

Man transplants plant in his garden.

"Oh, Irwin, I wish to god you'd get rid of that thing!"

'I remember, Fido, winning isn't the only thing...there are also stud fees.'

"I'm afraid the diagnosis isn't good."

'I'm really thirsty.'

Man is injured transporting cacti.

''Pet of the Year', That's me!'

Humane Mouse Trap "It doesn't kill them,. It just makes them feel really guilty about inconveniencing you."

'This English Setter, Irish Wolfhound and Scotch Terrier, go into a bar...'

Travelling with Child Sketchbook - day 5

Worm Appreciation Society!

I've got lettuce, snow peas and radishes planted. Seeds. Next I'll plant beans, zucchini, leeks and chard. Plus tomatoes and basil. A lot of work for stuff no one wants to eat.

'The ban of stimulants, includes St Bernards. The brandy keg will have to go.'

"I'm desperate, John. Please lend me your lawnmower."

"Guess who's the 'rendered'."

"It's my week to be responsible for the class plant."

Brushing cobwebs off the moon

"Sure, it's disgusting, but it's nice to have something that needs me."

People rushing into 'School of nursing' while a man reads 'Nation in nursing crisis'

"My dad works in surveillance."

'You know, I haven't been to the opticians in thirty years.'

Cold Call

Tiny Bird in Bonsai Tree

"And how's Norman taking to his new job at the Kennels?"

Alzheimer's and the Vicious Circle of Slow Death

"Santa set up the hotline because he knows not everyone is jolly this time of the year!"

"I have an enormous favor to ask you."

'Well, I still say he looks nothing like me!'

A blacksmith shaping a horse shoe on an anvil.

Use the word "pail" around the chickens. The word "bucket" scares them.

'I think it's time you tell Bruno about the fleas and the ticks.'

"We're one of the few professions that honors Labor Day by continuing to labor."

'Doctor, I overheard you complaining how hard it was to get good kennel help...'

I need some help on how to fill my kennels. 'Let me give you a few pointers.'