Kaleidoscope T-Shirts

Wavy Navy

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

Scientist seen on loch.

The Steakosaurus

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

'Currently I've got lemonade, 7% CDs, Discount Brokerage and No Minimum Passbook Savings. I'm going to miss banking deregulation.'

Cat going to litter box with newspaper to read.

Hanging Mime - Such a waste of talent.

A child and a babysitter gazing out of a window

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

'Jimmy. Stick to the outline.'

'Any more bright ideas?'

Octopus gets tickled pink

" . . . the victim was slowly roasted until golden brown and then. . . Oh my gawd! Stuffed with bread and savory herbs and spices!"

"You realize, I guess, that you've left your DNA on that."

Crime

"People are always whining about food labelling, but there's NOTHING that ANYONE with a reasonable chemistry degree and maybe a PhD in pharmacology wouldn't with a little effort, be able to understand....At least a little."

'You're not a very good listener, are you?'

Weak Research

"Nobody leave this room."

'It appears that he was given payback by his trophies.'

"Be quiet Carl, you're scarin' the fish!"

Liposuction: Help Wanted.

"I take it this is your first day as a scene of crimes officer?"

"Then don't do that."

'I don't see the problem.'

'Better call the coroner, Mahoney... I can't tell if this is a homicide or some sicko's idea of romance.'

Man who has crashed his safety bicycle

'I'm not so sure that the intruder broke IN, sergeant. Look, there's snow on the outside of the igloo...'

Do Not Laugh At The Bears.

Frosty Had It Coming, See?

"Just as I suspected, this man is obese."

Europe and TTIP