Justice Joystick T-Shirts

Law Judge playing video game called 'Call of Jury Duty II'.

Trial by Media

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"We're suing you under equal opportunities legislation for failure to represent our rights"

"Now that's a win."

The real murderer of Boris Nemtsov?

Florida Governor, Rick Scott, cuts funding for rape victims.

Your enemy is defeated by Fate

'What's wrong with those Europeans? We have more murders in this city than England, France Germany and Spain combined.'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"Who wrote this "Law of the Jungle" nonsense? It is highly biased in favour of predators!"

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

You don't believe I could be a supreme court justice! You're ruining my self-esteem! F.Y.I? � Whiny tirades don't look good on a supreme court justice's record. Thank you for your candid assessments. I will certainly consider their merits. Fine judicial temperament. And reject them for their shallow insensitivity! Rejection overruled.

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"Have you, or any of your acquaintances, ever been described as 'frolicsome'?"

"Now that I've swung back to depression, I'm truly sorry for what I did when I was manic."

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

Anti-war libra.