Junior Academic Gifts

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'I know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about the bears and the bulls.'

"It seems as if the people taking my software class are getting younger and younger."

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

'I'm not playing 'Bride and Groom' unless you sign this pre-nuptial aggreement!'

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

'This is your spinal column...It's a bunch of bones that runs up and down your back and keeps your legs from going all the way up to your neck.'

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

"Dad, this is Wendy, she's going to re-negotiate my allowance!"

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

"Finally...school starts next week."

'No, dear. I don't think the star on the Christmas tree will implode, and suck our living room into a black hole.'

'The doctor will be right with you shortly, he's finishing medical school.'

'That's all there is in my college fund? That won't even buy the beer!'

Anatomy.

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

Grand rounds vs. ground rounds.

"The good news is, the children in the district have strong writing skills. The bad news is, we have sustained a letter-writing campaign from the third grade."

'In which on-line university will you enroll?'

'He just had a near-work experience.'

"Oh no, those aren't recharging stations for phones. We have those there so physicians can get themselves recharged!"

NHS application system: 'Let me in! I'm a Junior Doctor!'

'You're never going to follow me in my trade, Son - you may as well go to university.'

'Is he dead, or is it intern fatigue?'

Out of hours GP service machine.

"We'd like you to be at breaking point seven days a week."

Messing around on the internet when your boss thinks you're hard at work.

'Please be quiet while the attempts to locate your head.'

'Reflexes normal.'

Bob's importance was all out of whack to his job title.

'Correct. And in the case of a cardiac arrest, every second counts. Who can tell me why? Anyone? Clock's ticking.'