Jungle Fashion Enthusiast Gifts

'I hate having horizontal stripes: They make us look so fat!'

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Designer Kangaroo Pocket

'Tarzan interviewing for a position as a corporate lawyer.' An interviewer asks, 'When we go against the gorillas, how can we be sure that you won't forget which side you're representing?'

Tigers brass band, "Tiger rag-that's what it's all about."

'Thanks for being up support staff.'

Jeff realised it was probably time to discontinue his subscription to 'Office Plant of the Month'.

'Forget it. Bioethics doesn't apply to us.'

Ted often though back to those good old days when he was king of just the jungle.

Lice outbreak at Jungle High (lion with a shaved head).

Jungle Games

"Tarzan no want computer."

"First I alienated the apes who'd raised me. Then there was a lot of turmoil with the colonials pulling out. Now Jane and me are semi-retired and I haven't swing through the trees in ages. Want a drink?"

Lion to safari man: 'I'm the king of the jungle and these are my official spokesmen.'

'...and cut the croc stories, I know you're just trying to make this dull trip exciting.'

tiger strangling snakes

Jane and Tarzan's wedding.

"We never talk about anything. 'Me Tarzan, you Jane. Me Tarzan, you Jane.' That's all he ever says."

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

Leopards do change their spots

'Ooga says we're descended from people!'

'Okay, but I'm going to hate myself in the morning.'

"Deal! I'll introduce you to Dian Fossey and you'll introduce me to Jane Goodall!"

'Don't worry, it's safe to come between us: He's not my kid...'

"I just want to get back into the swing of things."

"Relax, that's only Tarzan's yell!"

'We don't eat just anyone, ya know. You should feel honored.'

Law of the Jungle: Tarzan the Litigation Man.

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

Reality Bites

'I'd love to help you guys, but I've got it pretty good here. I protect them and they throw me their sick and occasionally the odd jerk they want rid of.'

'It's time you knew, Son -- you were abandoned here as a child by aliens.'

'Tarzan'

Rain forest: 'You are here - tomorrow you will be here'

Jungle Olympics